PERHAPS THIS IS THE MOMENT

Our purpose is easy. Our purpose is to further God’s Kingdom. Our purpose is to live a Godly life and lead others to him, to further that kingdom. Though our purpose is easy, the steps in realizing the how isn’t as easy. If we all have the same purpose, which we do, then why did God create us all differently? Why did God give each of us different gifts in our abilities? Though our purpose is the same, the how we live out our purpose all looks differently. And it is based on the God-given abilities we have had inside, since we were created.
We live out our entire life with the goal of success in mind. Success in our careers, success in the amount of our retirement, success in marriage and building families. It is common to feel pressure to to live up to the burden of feeling successful. But why do we continue to try and measure up? Why do we continue to allow the enemy to put the pressure of success and the ways we fail and lack in measuring up to others who we feel are more ‘successful’?  Why do we constantly try to compare and measure ourselves against others and their skills and abilities when God says:

“You are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession.” 2 Peter 2:9

“We are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand.” Ephesians 2:10

“We are fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalm 139:14

We are all given different God-given abilities to be used to further the kingdom of God. We all need different gifts to be successful in leading others. 
Jesus was our savior. His purpose was the same as ours. To live a Godly life and to lead others to God. The problem with assessing the gifts that God has given us, is that we often look at them as how we can further our own personal success. I have a passion and ability to use my words to encourage others. If I know someone is hurting, grieving a loss, I am filled with a power to sit beside them and encourage them through their trouble times. I do not have the ability nor interest in cooking. Yes, I can do it. My family has to eat so I have no other choice. But if there was a sign-up sheet as to how to help a loved one in their grief, I would not be signing up on the line of providing supper to the family. I would be signing up to speak with them and lead them to scripture, to send them cards each week with words of encouragement, to call them weekly to check in and see how they are doing. There are many people in which would feel completely uncomfortable with doing those things because they fear they wouldn’t know what to say or would say the wrong thing. I have been able to partner my training of Stephens Ministry and my education along with my experience of loss and grief to realize I don’t have to fix the problem for them, but instead, it is a ministry of presence to bear their burdens with them.

“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatias 6:2

We get confused by the difference in our roles and our purpose. Our roles are the positions God puts us in to fulfill our purpose. God is the master coach and creates the plays of our lives. The roles we are in; parent, daughter, son, sibling, friend, co-worker, employee, student, athlete are just the roles to fulfill our purpose. Being a mom is not my purpose. Because if it were, what would my purpose be when my children have grown? God puts us in the right position, just like a coach does with his team. He takes the player with the best skills/abilities to fulfill that role/position. He uses the skills the football player has to think and act quickly to make a choice whether to pass or run the play in the role of quarterback. What is the quarterback’s purpose? To live a Godly life and lead others to God. Well sure, his purpose during the game of football is to listen to the coach, to know the plays, to know the players and to make the best decision based upon what the defense is presenting. But what about when the game is over? He is still a quarterback. When your kids are asleep, you are still a parent. When your 8 hours of work is done, you are still an employee. Should we base someones success only on how they fulfill their role? So if they lose the game they fail? If the parent’s child is well-behaved they succeed? Maybe it’s more important to gauge our success based upon our life purpose instead of the role we play. Maybe it’s more important back in the locker room than the field. When the quarterback gets back into the locker room with the team and he sees a player is beating himself up mentally because he didn’t perform the way he wanted to. When the player is measuring himself with the enemies measuring stick, feeling like a failure, the quarterback uses his skills of acting quickly to sit down with him and his skills of thinking quickly to encourage the player that because God created us fearfully and wonderfully made, the player is not a failure. And maybe when the quarterback tells the other player he believes in him and recognizes him for his effort, will the quarterback actually fulfill his purpose by using the skills God gifted him. 

Are we using our skills in the way God intended? Or are we using our skills to bring personal success and pride or fame? What if the team did win the game. The fans see the success in the roles each player portrays. But what is more important to God? The way the quarterback acted quickly on the field or the way he acted quickly to sit with another player and lead him to God in his time of despair?

 
So does that mean we should’t participate in the roles we have interests in? Does that mean the quarterback should quit the team and just go around encouraging others? No. We are put in those roles for a very specific purpose. The purpose of living a Godly life and leading others to God. If we don’t participate in the team and role God places us in, we don’t have as great of a chance in fulfilling our purpose. What was the purpose of Jesus? I think we would all agree that his purpose was to become our savior and die for our sins. But early on , he was also a carpenter. Winning the game or improving your effort is a huge win in the game of life. But it can be easy to listen to the enemy fuel our pride in how we use our skills. As long as we keep focused on using skills to give God glory, then we are using our skills to fulfill our purpose. The question is, are you prepared to be put into whatever play and position God needs you to be?

“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails” (Proverbs 19:21)

“For it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His glory. (Philippians 2: 13)


Do we even know what our skills or God-given abilities are? What happens if we are constantly believing the enemy telling us we are a failure, because we are measuring ourselves up to the success ruler of the roles we live instead of the purpose God instilled in us? 
Not knowing our purpose, our true purpose and the God-given abilities God has given us, allows the enemy to make a way into our hearts and mind. When we listen to the enemy tell us how we are failing, then we are not giving God glory. Years of trying to succeed in the ways of the world will always lead to failure. No matter how important you think having prestigious, wealthy life is; a large amount of money in the bank, a huge house, an important wealthy career, successful kids who attend ivy-league universities; if you obtain success in the worlds eye, you will always yearn and strive for more. It is only when we feel in our hearts we are fulfilling our purpose in God, will we have the peace he promises us.

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” John 14:27

So why start this journey I am on? Why help kids and parents and those who God puts in my path to see their abilities and skills and purpose? Because I know the possible outcome of living a live striving for perfection. I know the possible outcome of living life for the wrong reasons. The outcome of striving to succeed by the measuring stick of this world is deadly. That outcome is a negative mental health. By constantly measuring ourselves up to the enemies measuring stick, when we try so hard to live life for the wrong purpose, then it is a breeding ground for a life filled with negative mental health including depression and suicide.

I strongly believe that my dad completed suicide because he didn’t truly know what his purpose in God was. He was retired from General Motors, he was divorced, he didn’t have a strong committed relationship with his kids, he didn’t process the feelings of grief in losing his brother to suicide. His purpose of being a provider for his family by working at the same job for years and having a retirement he could depend on took up the time and space in his mind to ever realize he was created for something greater. We need to have a feeling of being needed and that our gifts fulfill a need. My dad no longer had that feeling of being needed because he didn’t realize God had a much greater purpose for him than the roles my father tried to make important (father, spouse, employee, brother, son) So on a summer day in September, he ended the pain he had felt for far too long.

My why in ‘Aiming Arrows’ and teaching parents to truly see their children for who they are and to observe the God-given gifts they have been created to use, is to make sure children are raised knowing those skills should be used for God’s glory. I want to help parents aim their children towards a life where they realize, no matter the mountain in your way, God has already equipped you for the battle. And when you truly realize your calling, your purpose and the way your special specific skills can fulfill your purpose, then that is when you can receive the peace that God promises us. That in itself is prevention. That is preventing ourselves to be measured by the enemy. That is preventing negative mental health. That is suicide prevention. That is furthering the kingdom of God.

When I lay my head down on my pillow at night, no matter the ways I may have felt failure defined only by the enemy, I know my purpose. If I have one moment to use my gift of words to encourage my children or others I come across in my many roles, that they are fearfully and wonderfully made and they have skills to encourage others and lead them to God, than I have successfully used my role as mom or friend to fulfill my purpose to further God’s kingdom.

“Perhaps you were born, for such a time as this.” Esther 4:14